What The Fuck Is The Internet?

With an introduction from Mike like that, I can't help but succeed.  'Useless crap'?  Well, I might as well delivery the goods (or not so goods):
Something to play, some fun 'news', and some interesting news (short version & long version).  Plus, here's some news about the evil empire expanding. I guess there are a few more brands to add to the blacklist.
 
Seeing as how this is apart of Mike's site, I'm not sure whether I'm supposed to include typos or not?  Any thoughts?